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Junior Member
Picture of Cutie808
AIM: Online Status For Cute Stuff 8088
Posted
I entered this poem into a poetry contest and I am one of the finalists but i need a title. Does anyone have any suggestions?

Stop saying I can’t do it
Don’t tell me not to try
I’ll do what I want to
I will no longer cry.

If you don’t believe in me,
Then just leave me alone.
I don’t care anymore about what you think.
This time I’m on my own.

Don’t tell me I won’t make it.
I will if I believe.
Listening to you won’t help me,
It will just make me wanna leave.

I won’t take the crap you give me,
I’m sick of you putting me down,
And then telling me I need confidence.
I’m not gonna let you push me around.

Listen sometime to what you tell me,
And put yourself in my place.
It hurt me before, not anymore.
Stop and think, before you get in my face.

[This message was edited by Cutie808 on 08-01-02 at 11:33 PM.]
 
Posts: 22 | Location: New Mexico, USA | Registered: 07-03-02Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
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Quoteland Demigod
Picture of Hellsangel
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Stop saying I can’t do it
Don’t tell me not to try
I’ll do what I want to
I will no longer cry.


I think the last line in that stanza sounds a little foreced...

But, overall, I think this is good, your words deliver your message and fight back against the suppressor.

-Hellsangel

_______________________________________________

"Chase the sun in my head
Blistered skin turning red
I can't complain
It's something to do
Cloud my mind and erase you"


Fuel - "Scar"


 
Posts: 6274 | Location: Hell | Registered: 03-19-01Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
Junior Member
Yahoo IM
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I LIKE THIS POEM I IDENTIFIED MYSELF WITH THIS POEM..IT'S HARD BUT LIFE GOES ON.. A GOOD TITLE FOR THIS POEM COULD BE.. STOP PUTTING ME DOWN OR DON'T PUT ME DOWN WELL TAKE CARE
 
Posts: 1 | Location: orlando,fl | Registered: 12-23-08Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
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