Hi, my name is Courtney Rose. I'm new on here, though I have been writing poetry for about four years. I'm hoping to find the criticism that is needed to fix my poetry sometimes but the encouragement to continue writing as it is my first passion in life.

This is one of my favorites I've written so far. Please tell me what you think.
"Million Little Pieces"

As I stand there exposed and naked, the whole world to see

The reality is startlingly so, and my tears fall down steadily.

My worst fears seem confronted unwillingly,

you eat me alive with every single syllable you pronounce

and I feel torn, as though I have made a horrible mistake.



I wish I could make it better though nothing I do in desperation can

And it hurts worse the more I think about it than ignoring that which calls me.

I bet, though you don’t show it, part of you is ashamed

That you have to deal with this, with me, have to live with a child you thought you raised right.



You discover more things about me then you had hoped and I see the pain.

I’m trying to get better but this infestation of disgust isn’t so easy to remove

It festers and spreads, forms boils for all to see, causes unnecessary ache within.

And it’s black, dragon-like, weed-like, hard to get rid of the ever-spreading stain.



I do remember the influx of my inner being so many years ago.

I remember the way my mind slowly transformed from something that was so pure.

I was everything you ever wanted. Until I grew up.

Then it all changed, and my desires overtook that which was holy and right.



Some people overcome the battle but I’ve been beaten with the bloody sword.

Change isn’t as easy as 1-2-3, but they all say it’s only denying what you want.

When it’s in your mind, it’s even worse then the X-rated movies they tell you not to see.

And it isn’t hard to get lost in the rapture of your thoughts, coming one right after the other.



I never meant for such secrets to be exposed.

I guess the criminal never completely covers his tracks, does he?

There is always the trail of blood, the DNA, the single hair fiber left behind.

And let me tell you, it isn’t easy to admit the crime, own up to possessing the gun

The one that shot your intellect right smack in the brain and left a nasty hole.



In a world where nothing can seem absolutely wrong,

Where morals are confused with desires

And truth is actually a big muddled mess darkened with sin and pain,

Can there be definite answers through it all, when wrong tugs on us in eagerness?



I feel ensnared, almost completely misunderstood, and though I try to make amends,

Try to get my life on the right track, doing it yourself when no one knows you’ve started

Is climbing uphill in lead shoes and a full stomach—nearly impossible.

Please, will someone pick up my broken shards, and carry me away?

I keep telling myself that it will be over soon—I can change later.

But it isn’t working.

Please, I’m tired. I want out. I’m sick of being in a million unfixable little pieces

Rose,
Sometimes confession will wash the soul clean I hope this was the case.
Nicely done.

Jack